Stalkers have been doing it wrong. So many times you will see a stalker let their obsession be known. Whether it's obvious advances, or just approaching the stalked with that information. Frank (because I don't know how to say his name, he will be dubbed this for the moment) is one of those horribly idiotic stalkers that is bad at what he wants to do best.
I have a friend who is pregnant. Still gorgeous, heads still swivle her way. Of course, this draws a few of the odder crowds. Frank certainly is creepy enough for 4 girls.
To explain Frank is to explain the generic features of a common stalker:unwashed, unibrow, sports the same clothing apparel everyday you see him, and an odd collection of batty habits and mumblings. Frank is also Indian, and enjoys pregnant women. It's nothing new to hear him spout something about how he has a crush on my pregnant friend, and insinuate that it's indeed hot that she is.
Don't get me wrong, I don't think my friend is ugly at all. She's radiate. But when you bring in the fact that she's having a baby and that turns Frank on, we get a whole truckload of awkward. It's the way that he lets his fetish be known that makes all of this even better to deal with. For instance, yesterday Frank told my friend that he should let his dad be the gynecologist for her. What joy, what rapture! Now his dad can check out my friend and run home to tell his son all about it!
Less awkward, and more on the jerkass side of things, is his ability to not care what comes out of his mouth. For instance, Frank loves to tell my friend that she shouldn't have gotten "knocked up" by her baby's daddy. That's not offensive and totally okay to state, right? These sort of impressions never sit well. And at the base of this? He was never a friend to her at any point. He just kinda started calling her "sunshine" and then rolled into the whole insults of getting knocked up uselessly. You know what they say about assuming!
But not to fret; my friend has friends, including me. When I had first heard that Frank was coming around constantly, I was elated to meet and piss him off to the fullest. Opening meeting, my friend told me to give her a massage, and thus he would not approach. Oh, but he did. He even went so far to tell me "wooaahh buddy, back off". Guess what? I did it even more! He left and returned, with a pie. Thinking it was some sort of trade for my friend, I took the pie from him and ignored the fact that it was offered for my friend. Flustered, he soon walked away. I drank his rage that day, and it was good.
Other exchanges were to follow soon after, and eventually I became more comfortable about being a dick to him. Sometime during this, one of the earlier enragements (yes, you read that right) of Frank, he begin to complain that the US gov't put his father in the hospital because they forced him to drink. I quickly shut him down and then drank the atmosphere of awkward. It was filling. I'd feel partly bad for him if he didn't leave open his weak spots like a bad contra boss. He informed me that he gives his father back rubs, and vice versa. With that, I didn't have to say anything, even with his constant questioning of why that was bad.
Just recently though, my friend finally snapped. Good reason, many agree, since the guy tried to kiss and hug her after she told him how annoying he was in his continuous advances. He tried to say sorry, bowing like something from Naruto and trying to explain that he didn't grasp the concept of no touching. I don't know folks, I usually get it when a person yells at me the day before for a good 10 minutes straight.
He tries to talk to me and I ignore him. My friend, tired of his shit, explodes in a way only a pregnant lady could and basically tells him to fuck off. He gets up, smacks his head on a sign nearby, and leaves for the rest of the day. Nobody misses this man.
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